


Do You Believe in Magic?

by Fenrisnin



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bodyswap, Fluff and Angst, Language, M/M, Sexual Content, Violence, doesn't stick with with bodyswap, dont expect a story of pure fluff, it goes on to more angsty plot afterwards
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-04
Updated: 2016-06-06
Packaged: 2018-05-04 17:28:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5342417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fenrisnin/pseuds/Fenrisnin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It started with a fortune teller and her cards, next thing he knows he's tipped over a set of Dominos.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. This Isn't My Body...

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Piety](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5073718) by [fineinthemorning](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fineinthemorning/pseuds/fineinthemorning). 



> A later part of this story is inspired by fineinthemorning's "Piety"
> 
> Thank you for the amazing concepts I took from that. Its an interesting read and I hope you guys take a gander at it.

Kaneki was sluggish waking up. Unusual. It usually wasn't this hard getting out of bed. He really needed to make some coffee. His feet moved automatically as he rose from the dead. He didn't remember being this clumsy either. When his stomach growled he groaned, "I swore I ate recently." He froze... That wasn't his voice. Kaneki heard his joints pop as he stepped into the bathroom. Aware he was not home. Not wearing the clothes he had wore to bed. Looking into the mirror he went rigid. _Hide?!_

Kaneki hurried to get dressed and drink some morning coffee before running- er, biking where HIS body should be resting. "Please please. Hope no one has figured it out yet." He whispered to himself.

_**~*~*~*~*~** _

Hide wakes up and his immediate thought was, 'This isn't my room." Hide sits up and his first reaction was to crack his fingers. "Wait...why are my nails bla-?" Hide mutters but stops. This voice. Isn't this his....no... Hide jumps out of bed and looks into the mirror and sees white hair, silver eyes, pale skin.... He looks kind of like....Kaneki?

Wait if Hide's, Kaneki, then does that mean that he's a.....Hide bites his hand till it bleeds (praying Kaneki can't feel it) and watches it heal. "No way." Hide gasps. "This must be a dream or something!"

Hide keeps staring at his reflection and jumps when someone barges into his home. Hide slowly creeps out of his room with nothing to really protect himself with. "Who's there?" Hide asks with a shaky voice.

"Yo. Person in my body. Is it Hide or someone else?" Kaneki looked at his own body awkwardly.

"K-Kaneki? Why are you in my body? Why am I in your body?! Why do you-I smell....appetizing? Is this a dream? What's going on?" Hide keeps asking so many questions. He's not even looking at his identical twin standing before him. "Also!" Hide grabs "Kaneki's" head. "Have I always been this attractive?!" Hide starts to gather his bearings after realizing that this is Kaneki. He finally found Kaneki!

"Um... I don't know what is going on. I don't think its a dream. You're hungry, and I'm not sure??" Kaneki answered his questions in order. 

"What do you mean I'm hungry? That's an entirely new topic. I don't feel like eating anything at all! If anything, the thought of even burgers disgust me! How crazy is that?!" Hide's eyes widen, . "I'm going to be late for work!"

"Slow down." Kaneki said calmly, he felt like hyperventilating but he knew it wouldn't bring any good from it. "Hide, um. I didn't want to tell you, but I'm a ghoul. That operation transplanted ghoul organs into my body and changed my biology." He explained. "So you, er, my body can't eat hamburgers..."

"Aaaaah, I was right? I knew you were man!" Hide smiles but then looks serious. "That means I have to...."

Hide shakes his head. "No. I'm not going to be dramatic! Dude, you can eat human food again! Aren't you excited?!" Hide is so happy that Kaneki is back.

"I... I'm worried about you're work and my acquaintances..." Kaneki felt very nervous and finicky. "And what if I hurt your body?"

"Just don't be reckless, dude." Hide flicks Kaneki's forehead. "Call in to my job. We need to talk." Hide smiles at Kaneki with such a warm smile.

The image of his body smiling makes Kaneki feel very warm...? He pulls out Hided cell before he could give it another thought. "Who do I call and what if they realize its not you?!"

"Kaneki, I'm pretty sure they'll believe it's me. You sound like me...You _ARE_ me!" Hide laughs. "And it doesn't matter who it is. They're on speed dial. Press 4." Out of reflex, Hide looks around the kitchen for something to eat.

Kaneki dials and tells the woman behind the phone he had to take a few personal vacation days and that he wouldn't be able to come in for the minimum of two days. Once he hung up, he saw Hide looking through the cupboards. Only coffee was stocked. "Um, I don't have anything to eat at the moment, but I can give you something to curb your-er, my body's hunger?"

"So....I really can't eat anything but......." Hide looks at Kaneki in sadness. "Also, aren't you hungry?"

"I'm sorry." Kaneki takes a jar of Blondie coffee grounds and a strainer to prepare, "Yeah... It's more like a sharp pain in my gut. You're not injured are you?"

"No? That's just a normal human hunger thing." Hide scratches his chin.

"Hey don't lie to me? That's my body my tells?" He said panicked.

"I may have fallen off my bike last night..." Hide says nervously.

Kaneki lifted his shirt to reveal a few scrapes and bruises on his stomach and side. "Oh. OK. This will be gone in what a few days? A week?" He covers up the shirt and the coffee pot is smoking. "What?! I didn't do anything!"

Hide blushes and looks away. "Have a mentioned that I suck at making coffee?" He scratches the back of his head nervously.

"But I know how to make coffee? I... I made it burn?" Kaneki cleaned it out, "My body is good at it. That means you can make the coffee. pour the grounds in the strainer and... youll know." He sighed

"This is insane. I dont know why this is happening!"

Hide makes coffee and is shocked to find the coffee he made is drinkable. "I don't know but I'm glad we get to see each other again! Tell me! Tell me! What have you been doing?"" Hide asks excitedly.

"Ah... I've been around..." He scratched his cheek with his index finger.

"Are you lying to me?" Hide squints his eyes at the blond.

"I've been doing a lot of questionable things Hide. I never wanted you to know what I am. Yet alone have to experience it in my body." Kaneki couldn't meet his own eyes.

Hide touches 'his' body and is shocked to find he has abs. "Woah, Kaneki, what the hell?" Hide gasps in awe. Without Hide realizing, the kakugan came out.

 "The ghoul world is a harsh reality." He states simply, before his stomach growls. "Ah. I suppose I'll need nutrients more often..."

"Aren't you excited that you get to eat human food?!" Hide hugs Kaneki.

"I am..." He shuddered burying his face into the others (his?) neck to try and muffle the emotion in his voice. "I forgot what food tasted like..."

"Well let's go our favorite place!" Hide exclaims and pulling Kaneki to the best burger restaurant! "Big Girl!"

Kaneki had to drag the shorter man back to get into inconspicuous clothes to go out and they went on their way. Kaneki expected the place to smell nauseating, but a wonderful aroma of beef and seasoning filled the restaurant. "It smells good." He whispered in awe.

"It smells awful." Hide says with disgust. "But let's get some food in you! I know burgers aren't the best breakfast but oh well!"

"Don't let anyone hear you say that." Kaneki grinned, which seemed to come easily as being Hide. They were seated and Kaneki ordered.

The beget came and Hide watched as Kaneki took a hesitant bite of the burger. He smiled when Kaneki's eyes sparkled.

"It's a completely different experience. And I don't have to worry about reveling in the taste." Unshed tears glistened in his brown eyes as he took a bigger bite.

Hide lays his head down and watches Kaneki eat with a smile. "It's nice to see you happy." Hide mutters.

when Kaneki finished the waitress returned, "Nice to see you again, Nagachika-san. Anything else I can get for you?" Kaneki shook his head. "No thank you. We were just about to get going."

"If course, let me grab your receipt." Kaneki turned to look at Hide. "Its quite unnerving to see your facial expressions on that face."

Hide hides his face with a blush. "Sh-shut up!" Hide stammers. The heat reaches his ear tips.

"Its hard to think of myself as cute, but if its you pulling the strings..." Kaneki didn't know why he felt so energized by teasing him. it was so fun

"Since when have you been so cocky!?" Hide exclaims. People are looking and he oddly feels like he's shrinking smaller and smaller into his seat. This isn't like him at all!

Kaneki sees he's somewhat created a scene and backs down. "My bad, my bad. Let's get out of here." He left the cash on the table and got up.

Hide stood up after Kaneki but a passing waitress caught his attention. What horrified Hide was that it wasn't the food on the tray that smells appetizing to him. Hide quickly covers his nose and mouth and quickly ushers Kaneki out of the restaurant. Outside wasn't any better. There were so many people everywhere. Some ran into Hide. Some had wounds covered in bandages, but Hide could still smell the rich aroma of blood. Hide isn't doing too good. The boy doesn't know if his kakugan is out or not. He doesn't want to jeopardize Kaneki's identity because of his novice approach to being in public. The ghoul tugs on the blond's sleeve weakly.

"Ka....ne....ki.......urts...." Hide is clutching his stomach while leaning against the restaurant wall. "....elp.....me....."

Kaneki pulls Hide-in-his-body into the nearest alley, "Hide. Hide! What is it? Tell me!" He already knew. He hadnt eaten for a while and no newbie would be able to hold back for long. "We need to get you to Anteiku!"

Hide opens his eyes and his kakugan is activated. Hide can smell his human body's scent. His mouth is drooling. A woman's arms are wrapping around Hide from behind. _"Why don't you eat him? It's not like you'll actually be the one who dies. You'll finally be free of him. You should be able to end his life-make his light go out. You're his best friend. It's your right."_ The woman taunts in Hide's ears.

"Wha-" Hide turns around and sees nobody there behind him. The ghoul touches where the woman was just resting her arms. "Who was she...?"

 _"Now now. Don't be so hasty and reserved, Hide. Aren't you hungry? Why should you suffer? If you need to eat, then eat! Kaneki'd understand, right?"_ The purple haired woman tempts.

"Yeah, Kaneki would under-no! What the hell am I thinking?!" Hide shouts, grabbing his head.

 _"Why would you eat me? What kind of friend does that? And I thought I was the monster! You're even worse! You're weak! Weaker than me! You'll never be able to protect me!"_ A black haired Kaneki screams, getting close to Hide's face as he cries angry tears of blood.

"Eat him, Hide." The woman chimes.

 _"You're despicable."_ The kuroneki says.

 _"Eat him."_ The woman repeats.

 _"Monster. Disgusting monster."_ The young Kaneki just stares at Hide as if the blond is repulsive.

 _"Hide."_ She says.

 _"Hide."_ He says.

 _"Eat."_ She says.

 _"Worthless."_ He says.

_"Hide."_

_"Hide."_

_"Hide."_

_"Hide."_

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Hide shrieks in pain. He doesn't know what's going on. He doesn't care. He just wants them to go away. Hide finds himself on the ground and curled up while clutching his head. "IT HURTS! IT HURTS! IT FUCKING HURTS! SHUT UP! GO AWAY! GO AWAY AND SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" Hide is torn between the woman and young Kaneki. If he eats, Kaneki hates him, but this woman makes it look so inviting and okay. "Somebody help me." Hide cries weakly.

Kaneki wanted to protect the body he was in and now his body was plaguing his friend. He couldn't let him hurt. "Hide, look at me. Everything sucks right now but just focus on me okay? We are going on a trip and the pain will soon go away." When he listened and looked at him, it wasn't Hide looking through those mismatched eyes.

_It was hunger._

"Get away from me! I don't want to hurt you!" Hide cries, pushing Kaneki away. Hide bites into his arm till it bleeds and laps at his own life force.

 _"Oh, come now. Don't do that to yourself. Not when there a perfectly good meal standing before you!"_ The woman laughs and positions Hide's face to look back at his own human body.

"I can't eat him..." Hide whimpers while struggling against the woman's hold.

 _"Maybe you'll be the one who dies and Kaneki will return to his own body."_   The woman contradicts the words she said previously.

"I won't kill him. I'll die if I eat my human body...? Kaneki will be fine..." Hide echoes like a zombie.

Kaneki calculated the amount of time of would take to lead him to Anteiku via chase. However if he got caught, Hide would definitely revel in the "victory prize." He could reach Anteiku with minimum public exposure... but how long could Hide's body take? He was going to find out.

"Hey, Ka-ne-ki Hi-de. Won't it be more fun if there was a chase?" Kaneki said and booked it. Hide had good stamina-- _bless that bike._

Hide chased after Kaneki. His will is crumbling every second he hears the woman's voice. His sanity chips away every second he listens to the younger Kaneki hating his guts. It's like he can't control his body but at the same time he really doesn't care. Red appendages shoot out and pin the blond boy to the ground. They were close to Anteiku. It's just across the street, but Hide wants food NOW! Hide's mouth unhinged like a snake. He's about to chomp down on the delicious flesh, but something keeps him back. It's not the woman nor the young Kaneki. It's not the blond. It's like the ghoul's body is refusing to hurt Hide's body. Like its drilled into the vessel. An instinct to never defile the sunflower. To never extinguish the sunshine. It's Kaneki's instincts to never hurt Hide. Hide can't move any further to the blond. The ghoul's body won't allow it.

"Hide. You're doing so well at holding back. If you follow me I will give you something to eat. Just give me thirty more seconds." Kaneki praised him.

The rinkaku holds Kaneki tighter to the pavement. "You're trying to trick me so you can escape!" Hide hisses.

 _"Yes that's right, Hide."_ The woman praises the boy. Her arms are around the ghoul once more but in a more secure grip. _"Don't believe anything that he says. He doesn't care that you're starving. He is a selfish human now."_

"No! I don't want to eat him!" Hide is fighting so hard.

"But he'll leave me just like last time! He's going to runaway again and leave me alone to suffer!" Hide screams to himself.

"He would never do that to me!" Hide goes back and forth with himself. "Kaneki's a human now! He'll abandon me so I can clean up his mess and become the scapegoat!"

Hide is crying. His head is a mess.

"No!" Hide sobs. The kagune loosen around Kaneki as the ghoul screams at the sky and clutches his head in agony. 

"Hey shhh. I won't leave you." Kaneki grabbed his hand. "Put the kagune away and it will all be over shortly." When Hide managed that, Kaneki pulled him into the employee entrance of Anteiku. 


	2. Call me Hide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I... I think they are flirting.

Every twitch someone made, every noise and breath that echoed in the building, every little thing put Hide on edge. Hide's been fed meat and is now much more calm than before, but now the guilt is setting in. The worst part is that he can't hide it like he usually does. "When I was losing my mind back there," Hide spoke up as he sat on the couch in front of his best friend. "I saw that woman you went on a date with and a younger version of you. The woman kept encouraging me to eat but the younger you called me a disgusting monster. You called me weak and not strong enough to protect you." A few tears fell. "I couldn't hear myself think. I was so scared, Kaneki. I still am!" Hide buried his face into Kaneki's shoulder and wept. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I don't want to hurt you. I get why you left now. I'm sorry. Should I leave to? I don't want another incident like tonight."

"No. Don't leave me. There's so much we have to be careful of. Your full now right? You won't feel that temptation as long as you are full." Kaneki gripped Hide tightly. The prospect of the other terrified him. "I think we should stay together. Theres a lot you don't know about my life. And I yours. We have to keep on the appearances for the time being. Touka barely believed us on what happened and is still iffy."

Hide clung onto Kaneki for dear life. "Kaneki, I'm scared. I don't want to get you killed. I don't want to do something stupid and get you hurt. Oh my gosh, Kaneki, please don't be wreckless in that body! I don't care if something happens to me, but if you die in that body, you may actually be dead and not come back to your real one. Don't die!" Hide is freaking out. It's like there's something crawling around inside his head and is waiting to bring on horrible memories.

"I'm so sorry Hide. I am so so sorry you have to suffer because of me." Kaneki inhaled sharply. "I won't die. I am here now."

Getting lost in the moment, Hide grabs Kaneki's face and kisses him hard. Realizing what he was doing, Hide pulled away covering his mouth. "I-I'm sorry. I don't know why I did that." Hide mutters.

"I guess you're feeling some of my weirder emotions..." Kaneki blushed, feeling warm himself he placed a hand over his borrowed heart. "You got your body worked up a little. Do you feel the same way?"

Hide blushes and doesn't know what to say. "I-I-I.....don't make fun of me!" Hide pouts.

"I'm serious." Kaneki felt the urge to latch onto the other and never let go, it was a restrained feeling. He was an extrovert in this body. Hide was the introvert and it seemed he had made sure to respect boundaries. "I feel your influence in this body. Things I would never do. Like this." He said softly as he leaned in to kiss the corner of the other's mouth. It felt intimate, more so than a kiss on the lips.

Hide's face went red at the action. "Kaneki...." Hide whispers touching the corner of his mouth. Hide leans in and kisses Kaneki's cheek with slight hesitation. "So all this time you... ...like me?"

"You've been the one good person to me... You really saved me. Its really weird saying that to my face though." He said softly, resting his head on his body's shoulder.

Hide can't take it anymore and says the words that's been racing around his head since they were reunited. "I love you." Hide mumbles very lowly.

Brown eyes widen a bit before he grins. "I love you Hide. Thank you for everything."

Hide smiles widely with a blush. "K-Kiss me again...?" Hide asks shyly.

"Of course." He took his face in his slightly calloused hands and kissed him.

Hide moans and pulls Kaneki closer. When the two pull away, Hide can't help but chuckle "I totally just kissed myself." Hide jokes.

"We are so vain kissing ourselves." Kaneki agrees.

Hide tackles Kaneki in a playful manor. "Hmmmm." Hide looks frustrated. "Why can't I use the tentacles?"

"You don't. My rinkaku is dangerous." Kaneki chided

"Psh. Maybe to you, sourpuss! It's whatever you or I make it out to be." Hide smiles. "Teach me how to use it!"

Kaneki pulled Hide forward and brushed his fingers over the others lower back. "Is this ticklish?"

"Um....no?" Hide grabs his chin and snickers when Kaneki touches his lower back again. "Wait, what are you planning to do with that knowledge?!" Hide covers his back and backs away slowly. "If it's revenge about earlier in the alley, we're cool man!" A goofy smile is on Hide's.....erm.....Kaneki's face.

Kaneki leapt at Hide and started tickling Hide again. "You can't escape!"

Hide squeals and tries to buck Kaneki off of him. "Nooohohohohohohohoho! Kaneki! Stohahahahahap! Oh my gohahahash!" Tears are in Hide's eyes. The ghoul writhes around trying to avoid Kaneki's touch.

Kaneki trailed his finger trailed down the others back and four rinkaku claws came to life.

Hide squeaked when his rinkaku sprouted out of his back. They moved freely about and seemed to respond to his commands. Hide smirked after realizing he had better control over the rinkaku. "Oh, Kanekiiii." Hide croons. Before the blond has a chance to get away, the four appendages pin Kaneki-in-Hide's-body down and Hide is straddling Kaneki's waist. "Guess what I can do now." Hide's smirk gets wider.

"Hmm... I guess it will either cause me panic or immense pleasure. Either one will probably cause me regret."

"Wha-you little nerd!" Hide laughs as he tickles Kaneki's sides. It's Hode's body after all. He knows the sensitive spots on his body!

Kaneki thrashed. "I did you a favor- AHA. and you tickle me?! Touka--- She's gonna kill us...!"

"You tickled me you fiend!" Hide says moving up to Kaneki's armpits. Hide laughed along with Kaneki. "If she comes then I'll protect you! She never liked me anyways. I feel like she wanted an excuse to eat me." Hide shrugs.

On the dot, the door opened and Touka placed her hands on her hips. "You guys keep it down! We're running a shop downstairs!" She growled.

"Touka-- Save me! Ahaha. He'll kill me... he loves the kagune and decided to overthrow me!!" Kaneki-in-Hide's-body wheezed. Touka blushes and leaves the room after saying something about keeping it down.

"You hear that, Kaneki, my boy? She didn't seem to care!" Hide laughs evilly and moves onto tickling Kaneki's stomach. Hide watches the blond laugh and smiles sweetly. "I know I've said it before, but I enjoy your laughs and smiles." Hide covers his mouth with a blush. "I mean yeah I do, but not when I'm looking at myself! Is this another feeling of yours?" Hide lets his guard down.

Kaneki hooks his hands in the others armpits and uses his knees to throw him over his head so he can get to his feet. "I love your smiles. they are my anchor. the highlight of my days."

"Nonononononono! Kaneki, let's _talk_ about this!" Hide begs as he frantically yanks at his leg.

"About my feelings? I am feeling a little bit like a mouse under a cats paw." Kaneki squeaked.

"So I'm a cat?" Hide purrs as he crawls on top of Kaneki.

"Hmm... I don't see tails as I see claws." Kaneki laughed nervously.

Out of reflex, the kagune wrap around Kaneki gently and pull the blond close to Hide-in-Kaneki's-body for a bear hug. "Then I must be the laziest cat." Hide chuckles, before he flips them over so Kaneki is on top.

Kaneki kisses his body's neck. "Well. Take your time then. I think I like this."

"What? Topping me? How scandalous, Kaneki." Hide winks with a giggle.

"Am I topping you or are you topping me with the view of bottom? You put yourself here." Kaneki said wistfully, before blushing.

"Well... Shit I have no clue... I used to think that you'd be bottom but now that you're a ghoul, I think I'll let you take charge once we get our bodies back to normal." Hide's eyes widen and he looks away. "That is, if you want to be with me..."

Kaneki was speechless and red as a tomato. "I-I-I.... We are not having sex here. We are not going to do that whilst in the other's body." Kaneki finally got out.

"I never said we were having sex right now!" Hide said in a high pitch, The ghoul is blushing and hiding his face behind his hands. "You're so cunning."

"I have to be if you're the one with the Kagune." Kaneki laughed.

Hide hummed and flipped them over again. Hide curled up into a ball and closed his eyes. "I'm tired." He declares, the kagune wrapped around them in a defensive circle its by instinct to be on guard when around Hide's body.

"Hm. OK I think you're in a food coma." Kaneki pokes the his body's cheek. "I'll let you sleep for ten minutes then were going home... to my apartment then yours. got to get all my coffee."

Hide whines and snuggles closer into his real body. "I never knew I was this comfy." Hide sighs with content. "I always thought your lap was the comfiest place in the world! I was wrong."

"I know. You lap is better than a pillow." Kaneki sighed running his hands through white hair as he waits for the ten minutes to be up. "Hey. Times up sleepy head. Let's go. You're calm so it'll be OK in public."

Hide whines and snuggles closer. "Nooooo!" Hide pouts. "Carry me."

"Absolutely not, _Kaneki_." Kaneki purposefully said his name to see if it would stir anything. Hide's voice had always made him shiver, so he was curious if that knowledge still applied.

Hide holds but doesn't say anything more as he gets up. "Come on. Let's go." Hide mutters as he brushes himself off. "Hide." He's curious about what his name will do.

Hide's body responds with a light fluttering in his stomach. Kaneki grinned, "Sweet. Shall we grab to go cups? You'll like Toukas coffee."

"Yeah. By the way, why did I jolt at your name?" Hide stretches and opens the door for Kaneki.

"Hm? Why did this heart flutter when I heard mine?" Kaneki shot back.

"Er.....never mind." Hide blushes and closes the door behind them as they went to the cafe.

Once they walked out of the back rooms Touka had a coffee pot prepared and shooed them out with two cups. "Be careful Bakaneki." Kaneki grabbed sugar and cream packets for once.

"Yeah, of course! Because I'm a ghoul, and ghoul's are tough. Me, Kaneki, because that's me!" Hide looked stupid as Kaneki dragged him away. "I think she believed me."

"Yeah, yeah. Don't push yourself." Kaneki grumbled. "Don't forget the bag of food Touka gave us." He picked it up for the other anyways, that habit was all Kaneki. They finally got home, to Kaneki's apartment, with Hide's gym bag and groceries for the two of them.

The two unpacked the groceries and Hide's immediate response was to eat one of the cookies out of the packages they bought. He always does that. Hide holds his mouth and dashes out of the room and to the restroom. "I forgot!" Hide cries as he pukes everything up.

Kaneki hurries in after him and rubs his back. "Good thing I snagged enough to keep you bloated for at most a month."

"Ugh." Hide groans. "This sucks."

"I know it does. I'm sorry. We'll get this sorted out soon. But I'm afraid your going to have to eat a package." Kaneki said sadly.

"Why?" Hide groans as he slowly raises his head from the toilet.

"You emptied your stomach. The hunger will return." Kaneki tried to reason with Hide. "Just eat a few bites for tonight alright?"

Hide groans and leans against Kaneki. "I don't want to eat anymore." Hide mirrors the words Kaneki once said to Amon.

Kaneki loses his breath. Shakily he kisses the others forehead. "I know. I know Kaneki, er, ...Hide." His voice wavers, "I love you. Despite having to eat. I will always love you."

"Love.....too...." Hide passes out from exhaustion and rests against Kaneki. 

"We'll go to the mediums shop first thing tomorrow." Kaneki whispered to himself as he slung an arm over his shoulder. An hour passes and Kaneki has moved Hide to the sofa. Kaneki tries to read his books and in Hide's mind, the crinkling seems to set off memories of Kaneki's. "Cen.....ti.....pede...." Hide mumbles in his sleep. "....in......ea....r......."

Kaneki freezes and stares at his body in horror. What was it doing to his sunshine? He had to have imagined it...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Go to brandnewwings.tumblr.com to meet the co-author


	3. No Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hide and Kaneki go through some Night Terrors. They comfort each other and things get steamy... then angsty.

"We'll go to the mediums shop first thing tomorrow." Kaneki whispered to himself as he slung an arm over his shoulder. An hour passes and Kaneki has moved Hide to the sofa. Kaneki tries to read his books and in Hide's mind, the crinkling seems to set off memories of Kaneki's. "Cen.....ti.....pede...." Hide mumbles in his sleep. "....in......ea....r......."

Kaneki freezes and stares at his body in horror. What was it doing to his sunshine? He had to have imagined it...

"....cen......cen.....centi.......AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Hide thrashes around but his hands and feet stay on the couch as if they were tied down. "Aaaaaaaaaah! It hurts! It hurts! No more! Why did you leave me!? Aaaaaaaaah!" Hide shrieks in blood curdling agony. "993! Aaaaaaah!" Hide's back arches off the sofa as if something was being pulled out of him. "9......986!" The ghoul's toes curl up and Hide is sobbing. "No! Not in my ear! Not in my-AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! " Hide starts to laugh in hysterics. "Aaaaaah! Aaaaahahahahaha! Hahahahahaha!"

Kaneki is already moving, "HIDE!!!" He tries to shake the other awake. "Hide! ..Kaneki! Kaneki its just a dream!!" He yelled hugging the other close. "Let go of him! Give him back to me!!!"

Hide's body is spasming at Kaneki's touch. "Do you really think something like this will hurt me?!" Hide is still laughing. "Rip off my limps as much as you want! Hahahaha! 979! 972! AHAHAHAHAHA! More! Do it!" Hide starts saying things Kaneki didn't say to Jason. Meaning that Hide's mind is experiencing the torture first hand. It's like Hide is actually there. It's no longer just a memory from Kaneki's past. Hide will now know what it feels like to have his fingers and toes ripped off. To have a centipede in his ear. 

"Hahahahahahaha!" Fingers crack as Hide continues to laugh hysterically. His body arches again at another sensation of having something ripped out of him.

Kaneki slapped the other, jolting him from the dream. "Hide!"

Hide is looking around frantically with deep gasps for air. His body is trembling. Sweat is soaking his clothing. Finally, Hide looks at Kaneki...well....'Kaneki'. "K-K...Kan....neki....?" Hide's voice is raw and cracked from the screaming. "Hi....Hide?"

"You're back. You had a nightmare, Hide. I'm so sorry. You're Hide. We switched bodies remember?" Kaneki held Hide's current face in his hands. "It wasnt real Hide."

Hide cracks a finger. He sees the man with a hockey mask standing behind 'Hide'. "No. No! You're lying! He's behind you! Get away!" Hide shoves the blond back and gets up. "This is just how I'm escaping the reality, right? I'm inside my mind because I don't want to experience anymore torture!" Hide keeps cracking fingers and mumbling numbers to himself.

"Kaneki. Stop. Feel me. I'm really here. That man is dead. You killed him." Kaneki said adamantly as he moved and took the others hands. "I would never hurt you. So how can I be lying?" He kissed the others hands.  
Hide is hyperventilating and shaking his head. "Prove it too me! Prove to me that this isn't in my head!" Hide shouts yanking his hands out of the Kaneki's. He grabs at his white hair and pulls on it.

"Jason, you son of a bitch. I'm not afraid of you. Kaneki isn't afraid of you. Hide isn't afraid of you." Kaneki stated clearly and with meaning. "So disappear." The paused figure poofed away from Hide's vision as Kaneki hugged Hide and peppered kisses. "You're safe now."

The ghoul's body is still trembling as Kaneki held him. "Ka.....Kaneki....?" Hide's voice is so broken and has a childish slur to it. "I'm really sorry....."

"Shh. You just keep getting beaten down by my burdens, huh? I am going to fix this. So you won't ever have to carry them again." Kaneki promised.

"I'm sorry you went through that. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. I should've been a better friend." Hide continues to slur his voice from drowsiness.

"Sh. Let me distract you for a bit." Kaneki whispered whilst his hands explored the others body... his body. He couldn't believe what he was going to do, but he had to keep Hide from seeing more unpleasant things.

"K-Kaneki?" Hide asks a little bit more awake. "What are you...?"

"Want to have sex? Anything you wish." Kaneki tugged Hides shirt off with some effort.

"Sur-Surprise me..." Hide whispers. He traces his fingers along his borrowed body. "When did you get abs?" Hide feels himself starting to shake out of the nightmare. He still felt vulnerable though. Extremely vulnerable, but Hide fought to gain control.

"I train." He replied, catching a nipple in his mouth and sucked on it. 

"Ah!" Hide gasps at the sensation and holds the blond's head closer to his chest. "That f-feels so weird, K-Kaneki! H-Hide!" The ghoul's face is getting red from blushing.

"So we need to decide on whether to address each other by the names of our body or mind." Kaneki said trailing his mouth to the other nipple.

"Hi-Hide?" Hide watches the shiver that spreads over his body. "Call me by your name. It....it makes me feel good...." Hide blushes.

"Ka-ne-ki~ Does this feel good?" He asked scraping his teeth against the tight bud and tweaking the other between his fingers.

"Hi-Hide!" The ghoul arches his chest with a moan. "Y-Yes! So good! More! Ngh! So good for me."

Kaneki knew his body had been sensitive to fantasies of Hide, so it was just the act of serenading him with- er himself. Hides body got excited from the responses and Kaneki closed his eyes to just revel as he continued to tease him. his free hand ghosted over to the others crotch. "May I play with this?" He purred.

"Gah!" Hide's eyes widen and his mouth is frozen open. His body jumps from the brief contact and Kaneki's body is left yearning for more. "Please." Hide whispers. He's totally lost in the lust. He doesn't even care that he's turned on by his own body. He's feeling so good. "Please touch me."

Kaneki felt his heart jump and temperature rise as he started to palm Hide's crotch. It was his body. He was used to what it looked like. But to have this one react to it such a way... was really flattering. Kaneki started to catch his breath as he pulled back to see what had become of Hide.

"I-I never knew my body turned you on s-so much!" Hide moans as Kaneki rubs against his crotch. Kaneki's hips roll and buck into Hide's hand. Hide needs more friction. "More. Harder. Faster. Hide, please!"

Kaneki smirks, "Slow down Ken. Enjoy the slow build for now." If course he remembered each one of those fantasies. He was going to let one play out. He pulls off his shirt with one hand, minimalizing the pause in the rhythm. "Just relax and focus on the waves of pleasure.. " Kaneki would've felt embarrassed if he didn't already know this would work. "Seeing you under me... Oh, its so arousing." He admitted in a whine as he swayed his hips to stir friction of his own.

"Aaaah!" Hide doesn't know if he can take slowness. He needs it now! "Ngh." Hide stares at his body and traces fingers down Hide's chest. "Beautiful." Hide mutters with a blush.

Kaneki stopped to remove their pants. "Kaneki..." He was too embarrassed to ask him to touch him, yet alone to... finger him... 

Hide groans and nuzzles into Kaneki's neck. "T-Touch me. Touch where the kagune comes out. I don't know why, but something inside me wants you to." Hide whimpers and bites Kaneki's neck.

"Ah!" Kaneki gasped at the stimulus, he balanced on his hand and knees as he did as told.

It felt weird at first but the odd sensation turned into pleasure. Hide moans and hugs Kaneki closer to him and bites harder. Hide knows his body enjoys a little pain and the thrill of being bitten by a ghoul will surely do something to his body. "Hide." Hide whispers in Kaneki's ear. "Oh Hide."

Kaneki was pressed flush against the other, and the sting from Hide's bite made him writhe and buck his hips against the ghoul's. "Oh fff- More. make me feel good Kaneki, only you know how." He had both hands stimulating Hides back.

Hide releases his kagune and slides them around Hide's body. "I've always wanted to try this." Hide whispers in Kaneki's ear.

Kaneki shuddered at the thought, "Please." He said nibbled on Hides ear.

Hide sucks in a breath of air and wraps his body's cock with a rinkaku tentacle and strokes up an down at a fairly quick pace. Another one is circling around the rim of its entrance. "I know that my body likes it rough and raw. No prep needed. I like pain." Hide purrs into Kaneki's ear. "How bad do you want it, Hide?"

"B-bad. Please-- ah! Please get inside." Kaneki could hardly concentrate as the tables turned. "I want it Kaneki. I want to feel your kagune up my ass." He squirmed and panted, not caring if he was a mess.

Hide growls and slowly slides a tentacle into the other's body. He feels the body squeezing around him and it felt so good. "Hide... Ah, Hide, you're so tight. I almost came from just entering you!" Hide moans throwing his head back. (Reminder: They are calling each other according to the body they are in.)

Kaneki's borrowed face contorted in pleasure as a guttural moan escaped him. He whined when the appendage stroking him slowed. "More. Another. fuck me with two." He crawled down enough so he could bend down to lick the hard tip.

"I've got a better idea." Hide says in a husky voice. The ghoul positions his cock in front of Kaneki's mouth as he thrusts in another kagune inside Hide's body. One of the two kagune showered Hide's prostate with so much attention while the other thrusted in and out at a rapid pace. "Suck me." Hide moans as he tugs on Kaneki's blond hair and sped up his rinkaku.

Kaneki arched into it and sobbed at the new stimulus, his legs trembling. He pants erratically as he bent back down and took the hard, hot dick into his mouth, a hand weakly massaging the sacs.

"Hi-Hideyoshi! Nagachika! Oh god, like that! Just like that!" Hide mewls pulling on the blond hair. His pace slows down a bit so Kaneki won't cum too quickly.

Kaneki mimics a routine that always got him going on lonely nights. Increasing pace but slowing before the finish. His body was a slut for orgasm delays, but Hide... Kaneki moaned into it, Hide loved satisfaction. He could tell his body could probably handle multiple orgasms if properly stimulated.

Kaneki slowed the pace just then, smiling when Hide whimpered.

"Ah! Hide! Don't stop!" Hide groans as he writhes around. "I'm so close!"

Kaneki stopped massaging the others balls(continuing the maddening pace) in favor of moving down to pump himself in time with the Rinkaku thrusts. He pulled back, "Ken! Ken just a little harder. rougher. faster. make it so I won't be able to stand tomorrow!" He cried before returning with renewed efforts.

Hide pulls away from his body and picks the blond up and rams his cock inside Kaneki without removing his kagune. Hide groans.

Kaneki drooled and started bouncing on the other's cock. "So good. You keep filling me up more and more."

Hide bites his body's neck until it bleeds and sucks on the rich blood. He thrusts as fast as he can, making sure to hit Kaneki's sensitive spot with every thrust. "Hi-Hide....I don't think I can hold back much longer! Gah!" Hide throws his head back again and screams his name as he cums hard. "Ngh!"

The unintentional orgasm delay (from moving and changing focus a few times) caught up with Kaneki as he felt the warm liquid inside him and he shuddered almost violently as he came, screaming. "Ken! Kaneki! Ohgawdyesss!"

Hide hugs Kaneki close to them as they rode out their highs together. Hide makes out with Kaneki with sloppy kisses.

Still trembling Kaneki tried to take the others face in his hands. "You are so good to me. I love you Ken."

Hide shudders and groans into Kaneki's neck. "I love you too, Hide." Hide whispers.

"I've never used my kagune in such a pleasing manner. Next time you'll be on the receiving end." He sighed content.

"In my own body?" Hide cocks his head to the side with curiosity. "And you don't feel bad yourself. You are going to love it so much! In fact, your ghoul body could probably go for another few more rounds." Hide laughs.

"Really now? I'd say let's go for it but how much pain are you willing to take once you're back in your body?" Kaneki chuckled before yawning.

"I love pain. You should know that by now." Hide purs into Kaneki's ear. The ghoul leans and lies down on the couch. Hide ends up holding Kaneki close to him as the two snuggle close to each other.

"I'm kinda concerned by the degree of pain I wanted you to inflict..." He replied worried. " Since when were you into masochism?"

"I don't know. Haha." Hide clutches his chin.

"Hide..." Kaneki trailed off in a worried voice. (Back to calling them who they are mentally)

Hide groans and hides his face. "Remember when senpai beat the crap out of me?" Hide leaves it there for Kaneki to fill in the blanks.

"Nishiki?" Kaneki didn't understand.

"Well, when he beat the crap out of me, it hurt like hell. I was feeling it for weeks. But then you started to get very distant from me and it hurt more than what Nishiki did to me, so physical pain felt like a an escape from the other pain. I guess it turned into sexual pleasure along the way...." Hide blushes and looks away. 

"I... I am sorry. I was a coward." Kaneki frowned before kissing him.

"There's nothing for you to be sorry for!" Hide quickly says. "I was just a stupid kid." Hide laughs nervously.

"Not stupid. You did that as a coping mechanism." Kaneki defended Hides actions.

Hide blushes and pushes Kaneki's face away. "Just go to sleep." Hide says looking away.

They drift asleep. The next morning they both wake up in cold sweat. Kaneki wanted to crawl into a hole. Why hadn't his friend come clean to him? Why did he leave him alone?

Hide's face paled when he woke up. Kaneki's mother was way worse than he thought. Hide didn't know he was the reason Kaneki lived. As soon as his eyes are open, Hide hugs Kaneki closer to him.

"Why did Kaneki leave me?" Kaneki was lost in the others past reality, the emotions came off strongly in his scent. "I would've done anything for him."

Hide froze. "What did you just say?" Hide gasps looking down at Kaneki.

"I knew. So why didn't he come to me? I thought we were best friends. Maybe... Maybe if I offer myself to him... he'll come back to me." Kaneki couldn't stop the words. He felt so boggled down. Why? Why... I love you..."

"Kane-Hide! Hide! Snap out of it! It's a dream! Get a hold of yourself!" Hide panics. Why that memory?! "Hide!"

"Hide" turned to look at him and a desperate smile crossed his face. "Kaneki. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Wha-?" Hide is surprised by a hug that knocks him onto the floor. "Hide? Are you okay? Don't you remember what happened?! I'm actually Hide and you're actually Kaneki. Our bodies switched! Hide-Kaneki, it's me!"

"Silly Ka-ne-ki! I will take care of you. You don't need to worry. I'll make sure to fulfill all your needs." He caressed the half-ghoul's face.

Hide shudders but knows this is wrong. Kaneki isn't himself. Not that he was before, but seriously not now! "Forgive me for this." Hide whispers and smacks the blond's face with a loud 'slap'. "Get a hold of yourself, Kaneki!" 

Hide shouts, shaking the human harshly by the shoulders. "Stopping reliving my last! Come back to me, man!"

Hide shudders but knows this is wrong. Kaneki isn't himself. Not that he was before, but seriously not now! "Forgive me for this." Hide whispers and smacks the blond's face with a loud 'slap'. "Get a hold of yourself, Kaneki!"  
Hide shouts, shaking the human harshly by the shoulders. "Stopping reliving my past! Come back to me, man!"

Kaneki shrinked back and nursed his face. "I'm sorry, Hide." He whispered after a moment.

Hide looks at the red print on his body's cheek. "I'm....so....I'm so sorry." Hide gasps holding shaking hands to his head. "I'm like her now. I'm like her now. I'm like her now. Oh my god. I'm sorry. I won't ask for anything else. I don't need anything. I'm sorry. Mom, I'm sorry."

Kaneki hesitantly moved to hug the other, stroking the white hair. "Mom is gone. She can't hurt you anymore."

Hide cries into Kaneki's chest. "Kaneki, you've gone through so much! So much! You're so strong! Oh god I'm sorry! I'm so sorry Ken!" Hide cries harder.

Kaneki continued to hold the other till the cries died down, looking away to spare the others pride. He felt touched that the other would cry for him.

Hide kisses every inch of Kaneki's hands and arms. "If I were in my body, oh my gosh, I would love every part of you." Hide says. "Kaneki, you didn't deserve anything that's happened to you. None of it. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh." Hide gasps when a memory flashes in his distressed mind. "I should've been stronger. I should've protected you better. I should've been stronger. Should've been stronger." Hide pushes Kaneki down on his back. "I should've protected you better!" The black and red kakugan pops out.

"Hide. You need to calm down. You're accessing emotions that aren't yours." Kaneki said calmly. "You were the best part of my life. Please. We need to go visit someone."

Hide takes a deep breath to calm down. The ghoul cracks a few fingers to release the stress. "We really do." Hide agrees.

"Then let's get dressed. Madame Mim will be waiting."

Hide gets up and brushes himself off then pauses. "Wait, what did you say to me? What did you say I was?" Hide asks with wide eyes.

"You know what I meant. You still are." Kaneki got up and collapsed onto Hide. "Whoa. My ass."

Hide blushes and looks away. "Sorry." Hide mutters and crouches down in front of Kaneki. "I'll carry you. It'll be like old times, only in different bodies. Haha."  
"Heh. Take me to your clothes. I'm 'nakie'" Kaneki tried not to laugh.

"Ka-Kanakie........fucking puns!" Hide laughs carrying Kaneki to the bedroom. "I'm going to.....er.....eat while you dress." Hide leaves the room sliding on a shirt as he leaves.

Kaneki got the clothes needed and started a bath, stating for Hide to get him out when he was ready to switch.

Hide ate one of the packages while Kaneki cleaned up. After ten minutes, Hide felt ready to cleanse so he nonchalantly stepped inside the tub and sat across from Kaneki. "Don't give me that look. This will make it much faster.  
Besides, I don't want to waste any second I have left with you." Hide bites his lip as he goes about to clean his body.

"Left...?" Kaneki tilted his head. "I'm not gonna leave you again."

Hide sighs. "I'm not so sure."

"I swear it. I will not leave for months on end. I love you. I... I can't do that to you again, Hide." Kaneki said flustered.

Hide tilts his head. "Oh that's right. You know how I feel now. I assume you dreamt about me staring at my own texts all day and every day without a single reply back?" Hide grunts when he sinks lower into the water so his nose is just above the surface.

"Yeah... I saw how it kept you up at night..." He paused as he looked away, "I... will you stay here with me? I'll move in your apartment if you'd like. But I am staying." He said with resolve.

"Yeah! Of course!" Hide says surprised and happily. Hide swipes stray strands out of his face. "Well at least you only saw that." Hide sighs and turns around. "Would you mind washing my back?"

"I'll wash mine if you wash yours." He agreed, getting soap on his back. "You saw my mother, I take it..." Kaneki trailed off.

Hide sighs at how his body relaxes under his body's touch. "I should give you massages often." Hide jokes. There's a silence. "Yeah, I saw her." Hide finally responds to Kaneki's statement.

"ah... how... er. what part did you see...?" Kaneki hesitated.

"I asked her for something and she flipping snapped and attacked me!" Hide shudders. "But I wasn't expecting the visit to my house and deciding that I was the reason for you to stay alive." Hide runs fingers through his hair. 

"I put a tracking device on Jason. That's how I helped the CCG find you in Aogiri..." Hide admits. "I know you'll dream about it one way or another."

"Thank you for befriending me..." He said sincerely. "Jason... That was dangerous... but thank you. I wouldn't have been able to get out without the distraction." Kaneki said gruffly, rinsing the other's back and turning around.  
"Your turn."

Hide chuckles and starts to scrubs soap into his body's back. Hide occasionally massaged the lower back so it won't hurt as much when Kaneki stands up. "There was also this ghoul named, Cain...he tried to kill me." Hide doesn't want anymore secrets.

Kaneki growled, "Where is he? I'll eat him."

Hide giggles and nuzzles into his body's back gently. "It doesn't matter now. I didn't die." Hide rinses of his body's back with warm water. "And don't just eat every ghoul! You'll get fat." Hide laughs.

He huffed. "I can work it off. I need the RC cells." After a moment of silence he ducked his head, "No secrets, huh? I ate Jason. I was served as dinner for a ghoul restaurant but got out. I recently wiped those ghouls out in cold blood." He admitted in one breath. "I have done many more heartless acts I do not regret. But leaving you. I regretted every moment."

"You did what you had to." Hide hums. "Everything I've done has been for you. Joining the CCG, tracking.....um....many ghouls.... and I even came across a ghoul named, Noro, during a battle. He's pretty creepy..." Hide  
explains standing up.

Kaneki jolts at the name. "...like you said."

"That Noro guy stabbed me through with his kagune. I was so close to dying until another investigator found me." Hide shows Kaneki the scar on his left side.

Kaneki growled. "I will not forgive him. I won't let him..." His threats become incoherent but the anger was obvious.

"Shhhh calm down. I'm fine." Hide croons.

"He hurt you." Kaneki whined.

"I hope you never dream of that day." Hide sighs running his hand through white hair.

"Help me get dressed." Kaneki said looking up at himself.

"Wha-? Why?" Hide asks with a blush.

"I hurt." He replied. "And you have more than enough upper body strength to help me with ease."

Hide pouts and complies with helping Kaneki into his clothing. The ghoul holds up his headphones. "Time for the finishing touch." Hide laughs.

Kaneki smiled, allowing the other to place them around his neck. "Soon, I'll be the one to help you around the morning after."

Hide blushes and kisses the blond's forehead lightly. "Okay, love." Hide murmurs.

Kaneki navigates Hide to Madame Mim's Mediumshop. "This is it. I can walk from here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember to stop by Madame Mim's blog.  
> brandnewwings.tumblr.com

**Author's Note:**

> This is an RP adaption with (@ brandnewwings.tumblr.com) 
> 
> For those who wish to know. My tumblr usernames are:  
> fenrisnin, delirious-ghoul, and my rp blog delirious-ken


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